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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

Last Updated: 17.06.2025 17:42

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By taking turns talking.

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

My landlord just sold the house I’m renting from her. She included all fixtures, that I bought and installed. Does she have this right?

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

When a dog smells another dog’s poo or wee, do they then remember that scent for when they smell it again, or even further know which dog they are smelling if they know the dog?

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.